Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Love Thy Neighbor

Here are ways not to love your neighbor: call the cops on them, curse them out, beat them when they look at you hard, patronize them, gossip about them, take their snow shovels, salt thier lawn, assault their cat, stomp their garden, break a 40 oz. of Cobra Malt Liquor on their welcome mat, play loud, bass pumpin', house music until 4:37am., call gangbangers on them, say go to hell, mentor a local kid and then move away abruptly, volunteer at a local shelter then tell someone to get a job, open your home to neighbors and show them all of your nice stuff, litter, drive to the suburbs to shop, let your dog piss on their lawn, in the same spot, two times a day, send them stale cookies then, open your shades and laugh at them.

1 comment:

Emily said...

What? I think it sometimes good to call the cops on your neighbors. :)